Heart Lessons

I'm not sure exactly where to start with what I've been learning recently. In the past few weeks I have been doubting my effectiveness in New Zealand and whether I should prepare to stay long term or prepare to return home in the next year or so. Honestly, I don't know exactly where I stand yet, but I am still thinking that this is where God wants me right now. While I was at the Gathering, the Wesleyan family camp, the speaker, Dr. Bob Tuttle, spoke some very poignant words into my life. He was preaching about Joshua just before he led the Israelites into Jericho. The people of God had just spent more time wondering around the desert because some of the spies came back from Jericho and told the people that the people in Jericho were giants and too big to conquer. Joshua asked God if they were still supposed to go into Jericho and God gave him the go ahead. The deal was still on, God was still with Joshua and still leading him to the land of Canaan, including Jericho. As I listened to Dr. Bob preach, I felt like God was saying, "The deal is still on Sara, I am still here with you. I am not finished with you here yet." 

Another thing I need to come to grips with over and over is God's love. Sometimes I get to a place where I feel like I'm not "good enough." Honestly, I realize this is silly, but true none the less. The past two months have been like this, this could be one reason I've been unclear of whether I should be in New Zealand. Again, Dr. Bob was preaching and shared about a time when he was running and God clearly spoke His love into his life. When he shared this story, I was very encouraged. I was reminded that God loves me just because I'm me and  I'm His. This is a very good thing. Then the other day, as I was having some quiet time I read my favorite children's book, "You Are Special" by Max Luccado. Also, a very good reminder to the truth that I belong to and am loved by my Maker. 

Again God spoke truth into my life through Hebrews 13

⁵Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, 
   "Never will I leave you; 
      never will I forsake you." ⁶So we say with confidence, 
   "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. 
      What can man do to me?"

⁷Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith. ⁸Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

I am thankful that God keeps speaking to my heart. I am thankful that no matter what I feel, I know the truth of who God created me to be. I am thankful that God never changes no matter what circumstances or season I am in. And I am thankful that God is big enough to handle my doubts, frustrations, and insecurities and replaces them with His Truth.